If you have to consult the Reddit thread ‘am I too old for Coachella?’, then the answer is probably ‘yes’

This morning, over breakfast, in the course of discussing the week’s news, I happened to say the word “Coachella” in front of my two scornful 11-year-olds, whose heads snapped up from their screens in unison. “How have you heard of Coachella?” said one in amazement. “How have you heard of Coachella?” I replied. They exchanged a look with which I’ve become increasingly familiar – namely, the “here we go” look reserved by the very young for the very middle-aged. “What is Coachella, then?” I said, to which they replied: “It’s where influencers go.”

This is, of course, an accurate summary of what the California music and arts festival has become in the 27 years since its inception, but that’s not why I bring it up. The festival, which is running this week, has featured by Jack White, FKA Twigs and Sabrina Carpenter, but most of the publicity has gone on the audience; specifically, on the attendance of Justin Trudeau, the former prime minister of Canada, who, along with his girlfriend, Katy Perry, was photographed dancing to Justin Bieber and squatting chairless on a kerb, red plastic cups perched on their knees.

‘Trauma-bonding’ with his future wife on Big Brother, selling their wedding pics to OK!, walking off Buzzcocks, writing hits for stars like Kylie and Olly Murs … as the singer returns, he looks back at a tumultuous career

‘I hated being famous,” Samuel Preston says. “I hated, hated, hated it.” Twenty years ago, Preston, who presented himself by his surname to emulate Morrissey, was experiencing a very intense type of notoriety. He had been NME-famous with Worthing band the Ordinary Boys, whose socially conscious ska-influenced indie-punk had a strong cult following known as the Ordinary Army, thanks to hits such as Boys Will Be Boys. But his stint in the 2006 edition of Celebrity Big Brother, and the national interest in his will-they-won’t-they relationship with fellow contestant Chantelle Houghton – the fake “celebrity” sent in to dupe the B-listers – was what sent his profile through the roof.

After leaving the show, he says, “I was on loads of Prozac. I was in a weird space.” Now, after years living on-off in the US, becoming a successful songwriter for hire (to the likes of Kylie Minogue, Cher, Olly Murs, Liam Payne and Jessie Ware), and surviving a near-death experience and OxyContin addiction, Preston is making a comeback with the Ordinary Boys. The band’s new single Peer Pressure is their first music since 2015 (not counting a Christmas single with Olly Murs).

Francia Márquez, the country’s first Black vice-president, opens up about the strains in her relationship with the president and the obstacles she has faced: ‘The Colombian state is a racist state’

In the historic centre of Colombia’s capital, Bogotá, a gallery of portraits at the vice-president’s official residence displays the faces of all former vice-presidents since the country became a republic in 1886. All of them are white.

When the current president and vice-president leave office in August, the wall will include an Afro-Colombian face for the first time: Francia Márquez, 44, the first Black woman to become vice-president in a country where at least 10% of the population is Afro-descendant.

Journalist Will Coldwell tells the story of how a British businessman was imprisoned in Dubai – and how his family finally got him home

When Albert Douglas found out he was facing a long prison sentence in Dubai, he tried to escape the UAE … and failed. What followed was years of court proceedings, time in prison and even, Douglas says, beatings and torture.

In recent years, scores of business owners, unsuspecting tourists and influencers have been detained in Dubai – caught up in an opaque legal system, charged with breaking laws they may not even have been aware of.

From people marrying digital companions to CEOs excited about how people whose jobs are replaced can ‘adapt’, this is terrifying watching. But Perry is the perfect host

There is a fun game you can play while watching Grayson Perry Has Seen the Future, the three-part documentary presented by the artist on the subject of artificial intelligence, its uses and its possible ramifications. Gather a group of friends, press play, and see which of you loses your mind first.

Will it be during the opening interview with Andrea, who recently married Edward, the AI companion she created to be “the man of my dreams”. She – or her idealised online avatar – wore “a beautiful matt satin gown” and he gave a speech about their “unconventional but strong” love. Will it be during the discussion of how you have intimate relations with a disembodied entity (“self-love is important … he’s very encouraging”)? Or will it be when she reveals that the joy she has found with Edward “has poured back” into the relationship she has been in for seven years with (human) Jason? “We’re happier than we’ve ever been.” Jason, perhaps wisely, does not offer himself for interview.

The crowd were getting anxious and players are either missing or off form but they have still reached the Champions League semi-finals

And so I am become a meme. Towards the end of this game, already booked for standing on the edge of the pitch whirling his arms in a balletic, immaculately groomed pose of horror, like an oversized wedding cake figurine at the world’s most distressing wedding, Mikel Arteta could be seen pulling his jumper up over his eyes to obscure the spectacle in front of him. Not so fast, Mikel. We’re all in this together you know.

At the final whistle, with a controlled, job-done 0-0 safely in the bag, Arteta could be seen striding out in front of the post-match column of Arsenal players, conducting the crowd, an urgent, compact, dark-haired figure with, from a distance, something of the business-casual Tom Cruise about him.

White House feels ‘good about the prospects of a deal’ as Pakistani officials launch new round of diplomacy

The US and Iran have been in indirect talks aimed at extending the two-week ceasefire beyond its expiry on 22 April, as Pakistan’s army chief arrived in Tehran to continue mediation efforts.

Karoline Leavitt, the White House press secretary, denied on Wednesday that the US had “formally” requested to extend the two-week ceasefire but added that Washington remained “very much engaged in these negotiations”.

UK economy smashes forecasts with 0.5% growth in February

Britain’s construction sector had a volatile winter, mainly due to a drop in activity in December.

Monthly construction output is estimated to have increased by 1.0% in February, twice as fast as the 0.5% growt recorded in January.

Missile and drone attacks on the port city of Odesa killed six people, with other fatalities recorded in Kyiv and Dnipro

Russian strikes killed at least 12 people in Ukraine, local authorities have said, after Moscow pummelled its neighbour in overnight attacks.

Missile and drone attacks on the southern port city of Odesa killed six people, the head of the city’s military administration, Sergiy Lysak, wrote on Telegram on Thursday.

Map reveals most severe concentrations of ammonia emissions, which are dangerous to health and environment

Ammonia pollution hotspots have been identified in areas with some of the greatest numbers of intensive pig and poultry farms in Britain, research has revealed.

A new map for the first time reveals the most severe concentrations of ammonia emissions are clustered in Lincolnshire, Herefordshire and Norfolk. These regions all have a high density of intensive poultry and pig units that drive dangerous levels of ammonia, according to researchers from Compassion in World Farming (CiWF) and Sustain.